Thursday, May 21

Shiver, Shiver Insecurity

Posted by Shelly Holder

Yesterday's blog was on how I want to expand. Today, I had one of my first tests- showing the blog to my parents.

GULP.

Big ole' double Adam's apple gulp.

I read a few entries out loud to my father. Weird, and scary, and too many emotions to be named. But in the end, I got complimented. Isn't that great?

Now I just have to keep that momentum up- I've sent out some invitations to various friends and family, as well as other students and now even some professors (triple swallow and bob gulp.) Right now, I'm so nerved up that I really can't stand myself. I've shared a few pieces of creative writing around... a few. Maybe. Certainly limited to one hand. And certainly limited to five people. But I've never shared something I've been so intensely proud of before. Certainly never shared something I've worked on longterm. Nothing I've worked so hard on. And now I want nameless, faceless masses to come and read my blog?

Ah, shiver, shiver. Gulp.

So this is the week of the big tests. Getting the word out- to intimates and strangers alike. I'm not quite sure what will happen, but I'm crossing fingers and toes at the moment!

Right Now:
What I'm listening to: "Sometimes I Can't Make It Alone" by Mae
What I want most right now: Sleep?