Saturday, January 1

Happy New Year's!

Posted by Shelly Holder

I wrote this article for a column that didn't pan out, but I love the piece so I'm posting it here! Because I can =D

Miss Holder's Foreign Language Translator

We all know that college has a peculiar... culture that sometimes go beyond the rest of the world's expectations. In fact, sometimes those traits go so far that we need a translator--or foreign language program-- to actually understand them.

In my research I found these listed as the top ten New Year's resolutions. Wouldn't it be interesting to look at them in student speak?

10) Reduce stress
Translated: I need to write my ten page papers earlier than the week- or night- before.

9) Help others
 Translated: I need to go on an international volunteer trip over winter, volunteer locally over spring, tutor kids during the week and walk dogs on the weekends.

8) Take a trip
 Translated: I want to study abroad next year. And next, next year. And possibly the year after. After I come back from that vacation in Italy.

7) Find a hobby
 Translated: D & D no longer counts in this "adult" world. I need to think of something else to say at parties.

6) Find love
 Translated: When the four G's --greek, geek, gay, or girlfriend-- applies to the dating scene on campus, maybe I should expand my search area. To the greater East Coast.

5) Give up a habit (drinking, smoking, etc)
 Translated: I should invest in real orange juice, instead of the Wawa facsimile. And convince my apartment roommate that incense is NOT an acceptable alternative to showers.

4) Get out of debt
 Translated: I really need to pay my parking tickets. All five of them. And my IT bill. Annnd that library fine.

3) Eat healthier
 Translated: Maybe I should add a salad to my spaghetti and garlic bread with a side of fries and/or corn.

2) Get organized
 Translated: I should maybe be able to find my textbooks in the pile under my bed. Or maybe they're in the closet... maybe...

1) Workout
 Translated: I should get up from my desk at least three times a day. For more than just class. Or bathroom breaks.  

 So what did YOU resolve this year????


Write Now: 
What I'm listening to: I have Christmas carols stuck in my head. #thatholidayisover
What I want most: to get these Christmas carols out of my head. #somebodymakeitstop